I've been doing this Stitch Fix thing, where they pick out clothes and mail them to you. (It felt like an adult thing to do, but I'm realizing while I write this that I'm kind of paying someone to replace my mom.) They also email me fashion tips, and one of these was "Ten Simple Tips to Taking the Best Selfie." They are:
1. Natural lighting is everything.
2. Tilt your head at an angle.
3. Always shoot from above.
4. Stand at a three-quarter angle.
5. Put your hand on your hip.
6. Look for simple, clean backgrounds.
7. Get big, bright eyes!
8. Find a favorite pic and copy it.
9. Wear a little makeup!
10. Be yourself!
I just think that this list isn't taking into account the variety of pictures I want to see. Sure, beaming radiant women shown from above and at a slight angle, tilting their chins, and hands-ing on their hips is wonderful. But what if I want to see more of them than that?
I want to see my friends, family, and celebrities at their most compromising and obscure angles. I want to get a dentist's POV or see up their nose or capture them as I might driving a car while they crash into the side of me on their bicycle. Why not post an endoscopy picture of their ACL surgery? I want to see that, too, don't you?
So, I will propose my own list:
1. Have something funny lodged under your nail? Take a picture of it.
2. Extra sexts? Sure.
3. Definitely while you're sleeping.
4. Make sure there's one photo in your portfolio of you overheated;
5. And underheated.
6. Put your hand on your dog's hip.
7. Split ends.
8. Upside down with all the blood rushed to your face.
9. Trying your best to psychically connect with people throughout time and space.
10. Be interesting.
If you have a list of your own, feel free to comment below!