Fear of Flying

I had a thought about my anxious attachment or whatever you want to call it, my preoccupation with my romantic relationships. (Although, as I write that I think... uh, that's like the whole thing with romantic relationships, right? You think about them and stuff.) I mean what seems to be unhealthy, unwarranted levels of fear over being abandoned, over not being good enough, or being good enough but not seen. 

My thought was that my partner also wants the relationship to work out. This is obvious/not obvious. Of course, sometimes people are on their way out of relationships -- hoping they'll end, working towards their conclusion -- but for the most part, both people want the thing to work. Both want to be loved and to love, they want to have their needs met and they want to bring pleasure and companionship to someone else. They want to have that partnership box checked. Both people want the relationship to work and be good. 

It reminded me of anxious flyers. I'm not one. I know we could crash, but I look at the pilots and the flight attendants and think -- they want to survive as much as I do. They're going to use all their intelligence and will to make sure that doesn't happen. I guess I'm pretty okay at turning over my life to other people, if they're professionals and their own life is in the balance. So, it's like that. Relationships are my airplane anxiety. And I can over come the fear of flying in an airplane, so maybe I can logic myself into more confidence in relationships as well.